Desoapifying planet Earth
Most of the big problems of the world cannot be solved because they are far
too complicated. There are, however, some big problems that potentially can
be solved, simply because they are uncomplicated. One such problem is soap.
The problem with soap is easily defined because we have all experienced it
and will continue to experience it unless something drastic is done to
prevent an ecological disaster. And what is this time-bomb threatening the
environment? It is that tiny piece of soap that never quite gets used up!
There must be tens of thousands of tons of slippery, slidery scraps of
soap cluttering up the bathrooms of the world. The ingenuity of Man has
been unable to solve this irritating problem, until now that is. But things
are about to change for I have solved, or rather, dissolved the problem.
But before I tell you what I have done, spend a moment or two thinking about
that pesky piece of slippery residue. What is it really? It is the very
middle of a cake of soap, every cake of soap. So, is not the solution obvious?
Apparently not, for surprisingly nobody, before me, that is, has ever thought
out what to do about that middle bit of soap. And what have I done? I have
made soap without a middle. I have invented hollow soap. With hollow soap,
when it is half used, it is all used. There is nothing left. No longer is
there that annoying piece of soap lying in the bottom of the bathtub for
you to slip on. No longer are there any slithers that slide over the plughole
and block the dirty bathwater from flowing down the drain.
And you always know where your soap is because, being hollow, it floats
and so you can always see it. This soap never submerges below the suds, to
secrete itself like a submarine, but always stays swimming on the surface.
So, that is my contribution to Mankind, the desoapification of planet Earth.